Tired..

Been long enough since i last posted.. 


Do you ever wonder.. 


Why is love so complicated.. 
Why is love so troublesome.. 


Was pondering over this qns and the ans i got was.. 


" Man and Woman are different causing the difference in thinking and perception towards things thus causing conflicts "


When there's conflict, complication comes in.. and while settling the issues troublesome comes into the picture too.. 


I've always wonder.. 


Why is it that i can't behave like all typical woman when they are in love.. 


Being jealous when their bf do funny things.. 
Being exceptionally sweet.. 
Being able to be possessive..
Being able to stick to their bf.. 
Being selfish for themselves for the sake of holding on to their bf..   
Being able to do silly/sweet stuff.. 


As above, i dislike and wouldn't want to be term as that.. But then, that's what typical woman are.. 


Often.. i would commit one of those above mentioned.. but as i do not want to be term as that.. i will end up being strong.. and be generous.. i'm wondering how i manage to convince myself too.. to be able to not be bothered.. 


Spoke to my dearest bao this morning.. 
And it's a fact of what she told me.. i should accept what i'm feeling.. cause it's normal.. 
Yes, it's normal in the eyes of typical woman.. but for me.. it's kinda hard to accept it that i'm feeling like this.. I don't know why is it so.. 


It rounds up to me thinking.. 


I can't be a good gf.. cause i'm self-centre.. I wan things to be done my way.. I have my own attitude towards things and i'm a difficult girl to handle once i'm pissed.. I don't behave like normal girls such as being able to throw aside their unhappiness once their bf starts being sweet or give in.. I don't like sticking to bf.. I don't like  informing my whereabouts.. 


Now i understand the saying of :


" It's easy to fall in love, what's difficult is maintaining the relationship "


Perhaps, It's just me..